10 Tips to Build a Healthy Marriage
Created by: infozooms | Last Updated: 07/24/2010
1. Find common interests
Although it is important to have interests of your own, in order to build a healthy marriage, it is equally important that you and your spouse find activities that you can enjoy together. For example, golfing, walking, fishing, traveling, photography or cooking. Schedule days and times for these activities.
2. Hug and kiss
According to some experts, we each need a minimum of three hugs a day! A hug releases tension and sends a “feel good” message. Kissing releases oxytocin, which draws couples closer. Kissing also reduces stress hormones and may lower blood pressure! So pucker up!
3. Focus on health as a team
Whether it’s lowering cholesterol, shedding a few pounds, or getting more exercise, work together as a team, rather than as individuals. Teaming together provides mutual support and motivation. Set goals and reward yourselves as each goal is met.
4. Focus on the positives
Chances are you each have quirks that can make the other person frustrated at times. However, if you want to build a healthy marriage, it is important to look for the positives, the things that your partner does right. Does he remember to put the toilet seat down? Is she a really good mother to your children? When couples accentuate the positives in each other, they tend to be a lot happier.
5. Walk together
Happy couples walk hand in hand or side by side. They understand the time spent together is important. If you’re in the habit of walking behind your spouse or you’re occupied with the things you see along the way, grab your husband’s hand and ask him how his day was. You may find yourself taking a lot more walks with him!
6. Go to bed at the same time
If you want to build a healthy marriage, try to establish a similar routine so that you go to bed at the same time. This will give you the opportunity for some extra tenderness and intimacy.
7. Greet each other
Each morning, say “I love you” and “have a good day.” This sets the tone for the rest of the day. Each night, say “I love you” again and “good night.” This is especially important if there has been any conflict between the two of you during the day. It is letting your significant other know that your relationship is more important than any spats you might have.
8. Have fun inspecting each other
As you know, early detection is important. Every three or four months, inspect each other’s backs, skin, and scalps for moles, elevated areas or crusty areas. These could be signs of cancer. Don’t forget to check his testicles for lumps and have him check your breasts for bumps or nipple discharge. Make it fun!
9. Treat your depression
According to mental health experts, when a person is depressed, it strongly impacts the emotional and physical well-being of the partner. In the United States, 1 out of 10 people suffer from depression. At least half of these people won’t seek treatment, yet, cognitive-behavioral therapy and/or antidepressant medication have been proven to be very effective. If you are depressed, seek treatment.
10. Don’t play the guilt game
When tension builds and patience is worn, try to refrain from using guilt. Work together with your spouse to address problems. Don’t waste time and energy on determining who’s at fault. Couples who avoid the guilt game, are physically and emotionally healthier. Guilt triggers the release of cortisol, a stress hormone which alters metabolism and can cause excess fat storage.